Not Without You
by parliament of owls
Summary: The smile doesn't leave her face as she holds out a red envelope in one hand and a bundle of papers in the other. She hands the papers to Brittany, her eyes pleading for her to just look at them. Set during season 3 finale.


The drive home from Breadstix was a quiet one.

"Why didn't you tell me?!" Santana shouts, startling Brittany from her thoughts in the passenger seat.

The shocked silence that follows Santana's outburst is the first time Brittany has ever not known what to say to the girl. "You knew I would have helped you, I would do anything for you and we were supposed to get out of this god forsaken town together!" Santana's voice breaks on the last word and Brittany finally looks up, meeting teary brown eyes.

More silence.

"I-I can't do this without you. I won't"

"Do what?"

"Leave."

Brittany's heart breaks at that. With everything that's happened, everything they've been through, all she wanted was to get Santana out of here. Away from the people who hurt her and hate her for being herself and caused her to struggle for so long. Brittany could brush it off, but she would see hell freeze over before she would let Santana, her brave, beautiful Santana, feel that ever again.

"No"

"Brittany I'm not leav-"

"No! You have to go, Santana, you have to get out of here and make something of yourself because I know you can. You're amazing and the world deserves to see that. So go. Go to New York or Louisville or anywhere and be great because I know you will. I'll be here waiting for you. I'll always wait for you."

Silence.

Santana doesn't stay that night. Brittany lies awake, silently kicking herself for letting things go so far. She wishes she had paid more attention to her grades, but she just had so many more important things to worry about. She always thought she would have time to fix it, time to graduate with everyone. But she was out of time and she knew it. She wasn't graduating, no matter how badly she wanted to. She wanted to get out of here, to dance, but she was stuck in Lima. Stuck repeating senior year. Leaving with Santana was a hopeless cause and she knew this now.

* * *

She sits through graduation with a smile on her face that doesn't reach her eyes. She is so proud of Santana, so happy for her friends, but all she wants is to walk across that stage with them.

When Santana finds her at their lockers after the ceremony, Cheshire grin firmly in place, she hesitates.

"What's going on-"

"If you had graduated and gotten your diploma today, what would you be doing next year?"

"You already know what I'd be d-"

"What would you be doing?" Her tone implies hope, something Brittany doesn't really have and can't really handle at the moment.

"I'd be dancing. I'd go to New York, or Louisville, or LA. I would be dancing, and I would be with you. Santana, why are you doing this?"

"Just checking." The smile doesn't leave her face as she holds out a red envelope in one hand and a bundle of papers in the other. She hands the papers to Brittany, her eyes pleading for her to just look at them.

Auditions. Dozens of them.

Every paper holds information for a different audition in New York. Broadway and dance companies for every genre. She looks up with teary blue eyes to meet dancing chocolate brown ones. She cradles the papers with reverence.

"But why?"

"Because I love you. And you're too smart and too talented to be stuck here. And because you don't need a stupid diploma for these auditions, you just need to dance."

"How could we even afford this? Louisville gave you a scholarship."

She glances around to make sure no one notices and holds the envelope in front of Brittany's face. She takes it with the same reverence as the audition information, her eyes bugging out when she sees what's in the envelope.

"It's a graduation gift from my mom. I want to make something of myself. I want to go to New York and sing. But I don't want to go anywhere without you."

Brittany doesn't know what to say. She just pulls Santana close and kisses her like it's the only thing she was ever meant to do.

"So is that a yes?" Santana asks, quiet as a mouse and panting slightly, when they part for lack of air.

"That's a yes."


End file.
